Her complaints. She indicated I never valued her as a wife. >I would say things in public to bring her down. >I didnt support her when she was having issues with some of my friends wifes.. I tried to keep it together for everyones sakes instead of picking her side.. I wanted everyone to be happy. >I treated her like a house wife and mother instead of a wife. >I wouldnt do anything special for her. Never bought flowers >She was a stay at home mom for 9 years, and I did alot of stuff, diners, lunches etc and never took her. >I neglected her, and took her for granted that she was always going to be there. ( I told her that I was wrong in doing this) >She lost the effection towards me approx 2 years ago. I felt it, and then I suffocated her.. ( Her words) >I always wanted to be intimate with her, and when she refused I would get upset at her. > never cared for her feelings > never asked her about her feelings > when she said she needed to find herself, I fluffed it off..
I never gave her the attention that she deserved..
Any other parts to that list that you can own?
Sounds like no "quality time", "words of affirmation", "presents".(all thats missing is "acts of service" & "touch", those are probably yours)
Three of the "Five Lanquages of Love" by Gary Chapman. Add that to your to do list Read above book in a few weeks. Not now. You have been speaking the wrong language to communicate to your wife. That is something you can work on later.
Now you have to stop suffocating her, give her space(so she can work on herself). Detach/NC if possible if not then dim. GAL.
Keep your eyes and ears open and your mouth closed.
