HDWife trying for happier life

[HDwife]

Thanks YAH! I have read most of michele's books and the love languages and mars Venus. I am returning to this board to try again. This time I am taking full responsibility for my dissatisfaction in my marital bed and life. As I think I am a sex junkie (controlled, but an addict nonetheless), the whole " do not pursue" avenue is one I need to take seriously. There is nothing wrong with dh or me medically. We are 37, 38 respectively.

Tim, I sincerely wish you well in your own marriage journey. You're right, I AM luckier than most in ssm on this board. However, I live for sex. If you look at a pic of me 2 weeks without sex and then look at another pic the very next day after getting some, I look much younger, happier, thinner. Really. Not my imagination. I am exremely attractive when freshly ?ucked. The problem is I have little control over my pissiness when not getting it regularly.

I don't want an affair. I don't want a divorce. I want my husband to make love to me more often. A vibrator, while fun for the moment, leaves me more empty and depressed afterwards. I'm a codependent sex addict, self diagnosed. I just want to shed the toxic behaviors that I do to perpetuate the situation.

This is where I will be when I want my husband to pull his dick out as I refuse to ask anymore per my proclamation above.