First of all, I am sympathetic toward anyone who anticipates a rough day Sunday. A holiday that revolves around love (and all the god-awful commercials related to it!) is very hard on those people whose love has suffered such a blow. I am fortunate. My H has never cared for any holiday, and especially not this one. He hasn't acknowledged Valentine's Day in about seventeen years; he did sneak them to me when we were in grade school together. But he feels that the holiday is an invented excuse to encourage rabid consumerism. "People should love their significant others every day of the year. Why should I pick one specific day to show it?" is always his argument. And I do sort of see his point. But for someone raised with the tradition it does still sting a bit. I guess I do prefer the random acts of romance on total normal days, though.
He is still calling me every day, which is thoroughly confusing me. Why? He told me he wants a D. After that horrid phone call when he spewed all the typical crap - haven't loved you for a long time, keeping you around for convenience, couldn't ever love you again, want a D - he told me 24 hours later he had just had a bad day and was venting. I was tempted to slap him and tell him there is a difference between venting and transferring your anger and misery to another person. He has always done that and it drives me crazy. When he has a really crappy day he provokes me until I am the one angry and upset, at which point he is perfectly calm and content again. Irritating habit. But does that mean he doesn't want a D? He hasn't brought it up once since then, and I'm afraid to ask. I know I'm just letting him cake-eat by not taking a firmer stand against his A. I deserve a 2x4 for it. And I have to quit whining if I'm not going to take the steps to stop it. But I don't feel bad asking for answers to my confusion. What do you think is going on?
Hehe, it's childish but I am enjoying the fact that his OW is in VA and therefore buried in tons of snow and enduring awful weather. For anyone here who is east coast - I don't think it's funny for you. Ick!
Also, on the GAL front I'm doing so much better! I found an affordable babysitter, I'm going to a MOMS club meeting in the park Tuesday (thanks again, WhatNow!), I've met some people, I am hopefully going to have some parties soon (cross your fingers for me!), I am taking up archery and tennis, and I have planned several outings with the kids. I told H all this last night and very carefully didn't include him in the plans. The only thing I did say is that now that I've found a babysitter I can have some evenings off to pursue other interests. I hope he feels left out. I'm going to have a great life, preferably with him, but with or without him regardless.
I tried out MWD's idea about predicting your day the night before last. And I was really specific. I was going to have a good day and get lots of things done, my kids would behave and I would not yell at them, my H would call and we would have a nice but brief conversation, I would get enough sleep, and I would keep my diet on track. And do you know, pretty much all of it went as planned. I did go over my planned calorie count a bit (midnight munchies, darn it all!), and I did raise my voice several times with the kids. But every time I did, I remembered my good day prediction and immediately changed my approach. I kept telling them I had decided we were going to have a good day, so they had to behave. Silly as it sounds it pretty much worked! And I'm surprised at how often I don't have to pretend to be busy to get off the phone with my H. Like last night I had promised the kids I would play candy land with them. I couldn't linger on the phone with him. Today's prediction, eh, not as on track. Planned to have a good day, but slept/dozed all morning and had issues with the kids this afternoon. My own fault - they only do well if they get out of the house for awhile.
LOL, funny stuff today with the kids, though. I had (note the word had) an entire box of moisturizing bath crystals for them to help with their eczema...yeah. Not anymore! They dumped it all over the bathroom. What a disaster! But I suppose the bathroom needed cleaning anyway. And the bath crystals did smell good.
Hope your day was a good one - let me know if you need a boost on Sunday...I'll be around.
undefeated 24 H 24 S's 4, 2, 1 M 5 yrs
"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." ~Dale Carnegie
I hope he feels left out. I'm going to have a great life, preferably with him, but with or without him regardless.