Yes, I have got defensive on this thread because I felt that everybody, except you, was attacking me. My Observation? When a nerve is struck (on either side) folks can get defensive.
I was blamed for EVERYTHING for 20 years and eventually you get a little tired of it and don't want to hear it anymore. PROJECTION.. and as an aside, I found being blamed for everything logically meant I wasn't completely at fault. After all, no one is perfect. It's healthier to take accountability, learn from mistakes and let go of the boo boos.
I know I'm a decent person with a lot of good points. GOOD JOB! Keep getting better.
Some of the responses to me, IMO, have been rude and hurtful DISTRACTION.. and the road goes both ways
and have not understood the whole point of this thread. OBSERVATION.. and you can't control others perceptions. Take what works, leave the rest.
You're right about the fear, hurt, desire and hesitation. All there.GOOD JOB!
Would love it to be possible with me ex-wife, but fear it isn't. YOUR CHOICE.. and take some time to focus on what you really feel... do your actions reflect your words?
Did you see my other thread? It's on the front page - WAW - Worth the bother? My Observation? The title answers the question.
It does upset me that I now have some misogynistic tendencies to deal with. I never had any prior to the divorce. Pisses me off all the issues I have to deal with because of somebody else's actions. My Observation? Isn't that always the case? Take the time to process it, preferably with a professional, and oh goodness what you will learn.
Blame gets you nowhere. Taking accountability does. Letting go of guilt releases you. And forgiveness is divine.
And folks choose how they act, not others.
Get healthy in mind body and spirit. You're worth it.
