Please tell me what works. 1

[HallesComment]

I have been reading your boards for a week. So happy to have found you all and so sad that anyone else would feel for a moment the way I have for a month.

Here's my story.
My H left 1/18 saying he didn't think we could fix things anymore. We'd gotten into an argument on 1/17 at 11pm as I'd found some things on his computer that are not okay. We've been through a lot and were not connecting for months, maybe years. It was touch and go, and I could feel something was wrong. I remember begging him since this summer when we were fighting once a month to "just say it" "if you don't want this, then say it because I'm not going to make it easy on you, if you are trying to make me leave, I'm not going, I don't want this." He would say, I've never questioned how I feel about you, but I don't know why we keep coming back here. We'd figure we needed to do more together but things would go right back to how they were, him on the computer, me watching tv and us taking care of the kids separate, your night, my night.

Recently he has said, I love you and care about you that was never the problem. He is unhappy, he's been unhappy and he says he didn't have an affair, but would have if he could have. Not sure about EA, he is talking physical. He does not say anything but, I don't know. I say, What do you want-IDK. What do you think a separation means, IDK. He said at times he'd feel unattached, and at times things were good so he'd say to himself, okay this will be fine.