When do you request your spouse end an EA?

[MrBond]

Well it sounded like you were condemning her for doing things for herself like dressing sexy to boost her self-esteem and going out. This isn't being needy. She obviously has shown that she doesn't "need" him.

I saw you post to another person to get out of the house when their S comes home. This is the same thing.

She's just gaining back her self esteem and self respect.

[Allen A]

Woah... AGAIN you are reading into the post points that are not there... Does your spouse complain about you mindreading alot?

WHEN did I SAY going OUT is an act of NEEDINESS? I NEVER SAID anything even CLOSE to that... somehow you frankensteined that into the post anyhow.

She has shown she doesn't need him? WHEN did I EVER suggest or outright say otherwise?

You need to take a step back when you are reading posts and respond to what is on the SCREEN in front of you...

THIS is a point Michele Davis makes she calls Mind reading... you are doing out outright in your posts even... You need to change that habit.

[Allen A]

Lets put this simply :

1. If you WANT to fight for your marriage - do NOT DATE OTHER MEN.

I KNOW some people will tell you H may get jealous. Yes, he very likely will. How will he respond to this jealousy?

a. He could end his affair with OW and ask you to make a committment to him
b. He could pursue his affair with vindictiveness and a clear conscience

Which is the most likley outcome... A or B?

...

6. Take care of yourself. Do NOT date. It's ok if you LOOK attractive and men invite you to dinner, but do NOT go with them. If you want a monogamous commitment from your H you need to SET a GOOD EXAMPLE of that... dating other men is NOT setting a good example of a mother and wife committed to her marriage... Your H must follow YOUR LEAD...

I can add more later, but right now the halfway db commitment needed to be said like a house on fire...

THIS is what I wrote above... there is more, but this is the relevant points from a cursory scan.

NEVER did I say don't go out. Never did I say anyone was acting needy.

I have no idea where you are getting this stuff

[MrBond]

I stand corrected.

I was not "mindreading" I misread your earlier quote. Simple as that. Calm down. Does your W complain about you being too literal?

Anyway Dani. Going back to your thread. Show him what he's missing by being the confident, smart and sexy woman you are.

Good luck!

[Allen A]

You misread a lot of earlier quotes... I am calm.... I don't tolerate being misquoted, particularly to the negative.

[MrBond]

"I don't tolerate being misquoted, particularly to the negative."

Yes Sir! I didn't realize you were being so positive when it sounded like you were ordering her to do things. "DO NOT...etc." Sounded just a little self righteous. But what do I know?

[Puppy Dog Tails]

"Children, children . . ."

[MrBond]

Sorry dad.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Now, go mow the lawn.

[Allen A]

<Lights up cigarette...>

<Tosses it on gasoline-soaked lawn...>

LAWN Bursts into FLAMES

Done.