HI PEARL, I love your perspective - you really make me think.
If he stops paying I will file for personal bankruptcy. I don't want to do that but since I can't really hurt my credit any more; I'm not too proud to protect myself financially. L says that I can still keep the house if I do that... so I'm OK with it. So yes - I'm prepared for that.
H desperately dosen't want a bankruptcy so he might just do everything he can not to have one. We DON'T have to file bankruptcy together, but Since MN is a "Joint Tennants" state the credit card companies will go after him for the full amounts of each bill AND he would lose the very beneficial payment arrangements I have already negotiated. Some of these are fixed at 0% until the account is paid in full - as long as we don't miss a single payment (I'm good at what I do ).
So far with H - he thinks I HAVE been waiting for him to change his mind. I've told him several times since he left that if he changed his mind he could just come home and if that changed for me I would let him know. Maybe I'm not saying it well, but that 2nd/3rd paragraph is my end to that. I'm trying to say "this was my position before.. this is my position now" kind of thing.
Also I don't say that I WON'T file - I just say I'm not filing jointly and then assume he will file and serve me. I don't care if he doesn't file just to piss me off... part of me thinks he doesn't actually have the balls to do it. If he did - he would have done it by now. I'm calling his bluff - if he doesn't file I'm no worse off, the finances are now going to be on my terms anyway. Of course eventually I will HAVE to file if he doesn't - can't live in limbo forever - but we'll cross that bridge when we get there. He could be so mad about all this that he files immediately asking for me to pay more toward the bills... WHO KNOWS!!
This letter is going to open a can of worms... My big question now is am I ready to deal with NASTY H... This isn't going to go over well....
Embrace the Suck!!
T
ME28,WAH30, M 5YRS, T 7YRS ,OW/ILYBNILY/SEP 9/09 Served with D papers 6/6/10 Current
(I'm good at what I do 
).
