I just wanted to throw out a few comments here now that the two of you are active on the BB.
Ceb never started his own thread either... not only because he couldn't post 100% privately but also because he wasn't comfortable getting support from the BB like this, he wasn't ready to work on anything really and he didn't feel like he had much to post about.
What he did end up doing helped a lot though! Basically he would make comments in regards to things I would post on my thread. If I had a misconception about the way he was feeling, he would correct it. If I was right about the way he was feeling, he would affirm it. If there was something I still wasn't understanding, he would try to explain it.
Why was the BB so effective? Because not only did I have to take the time to read the entire post and then think about it - he had to think about things while compiling the response and I had to think about things before compiling a response as well. The delay and the thinking processes really help to slow things down do you don't get caught up in the act-before-you-think mode and argue and completely forget what it is you were trying to discuss in the first place.
Also, the posts were always there for me to look at and remind myself of what was going on. We started to really communicate starting through the BB and then it moved on to emails and phone conversations as well (but at that point we weren't really talking so that was a big step in my sitch).
David, I think it would be helpful if you just stayed on this thread for now and respond to some of Pam's thoughts and feelings about you - correct her misconceptions, clear up your feelings for her and the rest of us, etc. Pam, I think it would be good for you to keep 2 separate threads because I think you still need a place of your own but if you feel comfortable, maybe you would like David to post there instead?
Btw- I still advocate seeking out some professional counseling.
