I am sorry you are here. You seem to be handling this pretty well. I don't know what to advise you to do, as only you know what's in your heart. I am a pro marriage kind of guy. Since you are on this thread, I believe you are not done.
As for your questions, there is a good possibility that she will some day realize what she has done. She is addicted to OM right now, which prevents that from happening. I know, I had an affair and I was willing to throw it all away. Once I came out of my fog, I then realized my mistake. It may be awhile though.
I would recommend posting your thread in the Newcomers section though. This thread doesn't have alot of activity - not many people try reconciling efforts after a divorce.
