I break parenting style into three levels. The hard part is staying in the right level. So I feel it breaks down like this;
48% of the time it is controlling and negative...receives like response from child
4% of the time it is affirmative, respectful, and self aware-Great benefits, but very hard to maintain
48% of the time-Being a wouse-Children don't respect this and walk all over the parent.
The hard part is staying in the 4% were we respect the children's individuality, but can also place boundaries in a positive and growth supporting way. The delivery is the key...go to Covey's book and read the 4th Habit again (public victory)....I think it could help deal with your daughter more effectively.
You know that you are MLC carnage. I have been at it for 2.5 years and I will tell you....there is nothing YOU can do that will change that. ZERO...go to retro, go the MC, send her to IC, be nice, be supportive....none of that will stop the MLC roller coaster. That is why it is so important to focus on yourself. The only affect you can have on her MLC is to make it worse....so focusing on you now becomes double important.
I have to thoughts for you;
My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand. ~Thich Nhat Hanh
"No one can depress you. No one can make you anxious. No one can hurt your feelings. No one can make you anything other than what you allow inside."
It is the truth...leaders rise from the ashes, followers play in the ashes until the find an ember to burn themselves on.
