Buffet,
4 thoughts from one who has very recently learned:

1) Marriage is weddings, love, etc. Divorce is business. A series of cold business transaction. Treat it as such.

2) Give/concede NOTHING because you're the MAN, the father, noble or because of how you want to be remembered as having comported yourself or thought of by people who learn the details of your divorce (because they will - and a distorted version at that.)

3) Get ready for batchitcrazy like you've NEVER seen or imagined.

4) OBEY your Lawyer. Always.


After a relatively non-contentious meeting in which every one of the final sticking points were amicably (I thought) agreed upon, my Lawyer, who had met my relatively meek ex for the first time that morning said, "And your wife...what an absolute BITCH!"

It can be like a war. Let your L be the soldier. Don't even BOTHER getting emotional
or even seeming emotional during any part of the official meetings or proceedings.

Good luck ad prayers.

Gardener

"My soul, be satisfied with flowers,
With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them
In the one garden you may call your own."
Cyrano deBergerac