I assume it feels as a lot of time has gone by and you probably thought that, by now, things would be a lot better and when you are down, things look equally painful or not much better, BUT, 2 years is really not a long time to come to terms with the end of your life the way you knew it, to break down in pieces, get back on your feet again, regroup, take care of practicalities, accept the new reality and face it. I mean, you have come a long way and you need to remind yourself that.
I am struggling too with being pessimistic. It's very hard to keep a positive attitude when you are hitting a low or are tired of fighting. But it is critical that you do. You have got to tell yourself, things will be ok in the end, if they are not Ok, it is not the end yet... (()) K
PS I know you didnt ask for a reply, hope you dont mind...
