I have been talking to the W the past couple of days about the parenting plan and the 3rd party, aka OM. The conversations were emotional and sometimes heated, but the at the end we were able to keep things rational and friendly. She has agreed to all of my requests: He is not to attend any kids functions when I am present for a year; he is not to be left alone with the kids for a year or unitl we agree upon it; and I get the right of first refusal.
The thing that was odd about all of this is that they cannot understand why I am making such requests. She told me he does not understand why I am blaming him for all of this. I told her I am not blaming him and that I blame her. I then went on to tell her that this does not change the fact that I have a very low opinion of him and that asking me to be around him would just be wrong. She also told me she has been re-assuring him that the M was broken before they started seeing each other and that he had nothing to do with the "broken" part. This statement is confusing for me. I understand the M was broken but this in no way justifies her (or his) behaviors, right? Can the OM not see he was involved with a married woman and as such, had or is having some role in all of this. At this point, the both of them do not think they have done anything wrong and are unwilling or incapable of taking any responsibility for their R and the effect it had on our M, even if it was already broken.
I am also pissed off about the intro to the kids. Not because it happend but by the way she went about it. Based on what I have read, things need to move slowly in this area to help protect the kids. Well, she took the kids and him to another city for a family gathering for three days. We had talked about this and agreed it was moving to fast, but then she did it anyway. My kids are great and they took it well but things could have easily turned out differently. Everytime she calls me selfish I just want to explode!!!
