Flushing the toxins from my life

[Gnosis]

CC just a quick note on your last journal entry:

1. If she doesn't want you as an H you have to get it in your head that you cannot be her gay BFF either.

3. If she's not interested in being a mother you cannot force her. She will have her regrets later. STOP FORCING and BEGGING her to see S7. That's up to her -- and you know she is mentally unstable as it is.

4. She was "enjoying her freedom" for the past 3 years, why should that change now?

5. Cut off the financial aid. That stays in the family -- which is you and S7 now. You don't owe her anything. Wake up.

6. She is using you as a crutch and to fill in the gap where her lovers fall short. Stop.

7. If she's so good at manipulating you and you are too weak to resist then avoid her at all costs.

It's one thing to KNOW what you need to do and another to DO IT. Every time that you don't do what you know you need to do, it knocks your self-esteem lower until all that is left is a spineless zombie. Start doing what you know you have to do before that happens.

One more thing... you need to get laid ASAP. Go and get laid so that little "spell" she casts over you is broken. Once you see that another woman can desire you and want you it will remove the power she has over you. You are divorcing. Your M was over a long time ago. All you're waiting for is the legal paperwork.

And if you have still have doubts that you have done the right thing... remove them. Your good mental health is essential for you to raise S7.