I know, dieting is the worst. I love chocolate and a whole assortment of weight unfriendly foods! I did lose 4 pounds last week and hope to continue towards my goal of losing 40 pounds by June.
My W did go to another day of cooking classes this weekend but at least she came directly home afterward. She used to "lose" a few hours between her classes and getting home which was her primary time together with OM. Maybe her coming straight home is a good sign. She seems down, going to bed early and having trouble getting up in the morning. I am thinking that she is depressed and wonder if she is grieving OM. I have seen very little lately to make me suspect that she is still seeing him but I know not to get excited yet because we are nowhere near a R. She still has not expressed any remorse and has not apologized about her A. I consider us to be at an equilibrium state and this is allowing me some space to spend some energy worrying about me for a change!
We still go day to day, having fun and acting like nothing is wrong except that there is no physical intimacy. No R discussions now for the past couple of weeks, but we talk a lot more these days than we did in the months leading up to the bomb. Good conversations that just flow and aren't tense or forced which is nice.
Of course, V-day is coming up and I plan to get a blank card with only "Happy Valentines Day, Love Junco" written in it and a small box of chocolates. I will hold on to these and give one or both based on what she gives me. If she gives me nothing, I will hold off on it too.
I guess I am just waiting to see where this goes for now. She is not doing anything blatantly suspicious right now and I am kinda enjoying the space to focus on me so I hope I am not just being an Ostrich! Time will tell I guess...
