Strange thing is there was a short part when I was talking to her tonight when her eyes welled up with tears. Of course, could just be her guilt.
My guess would be guilt, too. You may recall that in one rare, rather benign phone call 3 weeks ago, X suddenly burst out crying,"I never meant for this to happen. Never meant to cause all this strife," etc. etc.
The following week on the phone when she acknowledged not talking to me at all about her unhappiness (which still hasn't been explained or described to me) but instead admitted to confiding in daughter for months pre-bomb, I said, "I wish you had told me." She replied, "So do I. I wish I had, too."
Those two brief glimpses of remorse (talk about the ol' "too little, too late") were quickly replaced by the business-as-usual coldness and ultimately, right up to "the dotted line" today, meant absolutely nothing.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
