#2: WAH separated from us & I'm on the DBing path

[flowmom]

So, no one thinks that an email like this would be pursuing/pressuring? It really wasn't my idea!

R2C, I like your wording so much better!

Why did you end MC?

We had an MC who really didn't help us and she kept on saying that we were at an impasse due to H not shifting. We both got discouraged and just stopped, leaving things hanging. I guess I thought we'd back-burner it and try something different. I guess H thought that was the last nail in the coffin.

If H sees all counseling as working on a relationship he might be done with, he may refuse even though it could help with the separation.

Possibly. On the other hand, he may feel a sense of responsibility to meet a specific request if it's something that I need for the separation rather than something that requiring him to rise to the challenge of working on the R. I guess I don't totally know what the C has in mind.

Would it be easier to say this on phone in a friendly way or do you think he would respond better by email after having time to think about it?

The benefit of email is that it doesn't put H on the spot. He can sit on it and not be required to respond right away. The how to improve your R... book cautions about how men respond to being taken off-guard, etc. I think that his knee-jerk response would be "no", so email has a better likelihood of giving him a bit of time and breathing space.