Just stopping by to say hi. Threads fly over here in newcomers -hard to keep up!:)
I am with others - it sounds to me like your H's issues really aren't with you, but with something in himself, whether it is an MLC, depression, low testosterone, whatever.
Just make sure you don't lose yourself in all of this and trying to fix your marriage.
Felt good. We're getting 10 inches of snow right now, and it was so refreshing! My doggie loved it, too!
The friend I went with, is, to say the least, a bit ditzy... So, she's a big crack-up all the time. She's shows up in snow pants, her big coat, hat, scarf, etc... AND CLOGS!!! LMAO! Clogs, really? We're getting 10 inches of snow! Ooooookay!
Shadow comment... I used to be very social in a couples kind of social, always planning the Chicago weekend trip, where are we meeting for dinner Sat night, etc... H is not interested in that stuff now. And, the rest are all carrying on, as couples, of course! Also, I used to be very open and jovial. I am still pretty perky and jovial, but some topics, after you've lived w/such heartache, are just not... funny, anymore. And, the great outfits and accessories, etc... To me, that was fun. Not over-extravagant, but fun. I still always look nice, but who dresses like that when you don't really go anywhere like we used to.
So, I'm still here, but more of a shadow of what I was.
Last edited by mindfull; 02/09/1006:29 PM.
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Go to Chicago by yourself or take a girlfriend. Dress up for yourself. Make your own fun.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I have never understood this. I guess I just don't have it in me to purposely say something to hurt someone's feelings, or make them feel bad.
I get that, but I never thought I did it, but after going thru my sitch, and reflecting on myself, I saw that I did a lot of what your H has done. I know I complained a lot, and I realized how I had not been an encourager, but instead a destroyer. But I don't think I ever had anyone really talk to me about it.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
I do believe those are things he has to figure out, but just like going thru a divorce sitch, which they also must figure out, I think we still have the ability to help lead them in the right direction, but it will be harder.
also, the one thing you haven't tried, is putting the moves on him, or being an irresistible sexy tease. you know I'll be pushing that one on ya forever. lol
not that it will cure his MLC/depression but I think it could improve his self-worth, which in turn, is part of the reasons for MLC/depression, right?
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
I fell in love again all things go, all things go drove to Chicago all things know, all things know we sold our clothes to the state I don't mind, I don't mind I made a lot of mistakes in my mind, in my mind
you came to take us all things go, all things go to recreate us all things grow, all things grow we had our mindset all things know, all things know you had to find it all things go, all things go
I drove to New York in the van, with my friend we slept in parking lots I don't mind, I don't mind I was in love with the place in my mind, in my mind I made a lot of mistakes in my mind, in my mind
you came to take us all things go, all things go to recreate us all things grow, all things grow we had our mindset all things know, all things know you had to find it all things go, all things go
if I was crying in the van, with my friend it was for freedom from myself and from the land I made a lot of mistakes I made a lot of mistakes I made a lot of mistakes I made a lot of mistakes
you came to take us all things go, all things go to recreate us all things grow, all things grow we had our mindset all things know, all things know you had to find it all things go, all things go
you came to take us all things go, all things go to recreate us all things grow, all things grow we had our mindset (I made a lot of mistakes) all things know, all things know (I made a lot of mistakes) you had to find it (I made a lot of mistakes) all things go, all things go (I made a lot of mistakes)
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
you know I'll be pushing that one on ya forever. lol