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LolaL Offline OP
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I think what holds me back is fear. This is not my first trip around the marriage merry go round. This time, though, I thought I did everything right. And in the end, it wasn't enough.

That being said, part of me is deathly afraid of getting out ther again, and I think that is why I held out for so long. It was an excuse not to have to date, or think of the possibility of dating. When you get married, you don't want to date. I didn't. But I also realize that I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life.

If SG would come back right now, I would probably still try. But there would still have to be some strict guidelines set, and he would have to move to NY from TX eventually. I don't know if that will happen, and the probability is low. And if it does, it will almost probably be at a time when I am really done.

I really thought this was it, and I would be married forever. I guess God had other plans!


Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..

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LOL,

Ohhh goodness I know the feeling. I've never dated anyone besides my H. What is dating? How do you do it? It's seems complicated, full or risk, rejection, fear, I have a son...auhh..
Seems there are so many of us in this boat..."divorced" and many with kids it's just the norm.

I'm chosing to believe (even if I don't at times) that I can find happiness again, love again, and find someone who will treat me with respect and love. I don't want to be alone forever either. So you have to put yourself out there....to meet someone. It's really hard I know what you mean...I'm very scared of the idea of it too.


Me: 31
H: 30
Son 2.5

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Scared? Hey, that's mild. How about terrified? So scared you can't move and can't even go out with your friends except to a movie where there is NO possibility of meeting anyone? Yeah, that's paralyzing. smile

You guys get out there! Have fun!!! Who knows? Maybe you'll meet a forever someone or maybe you'll just have a really good time. That's what it's all about, right?


T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43
bomb12/4/07
PA5/07
S12/26/07
D final 11/17/08
Back together with no defined R 05/2010
confused....to say the least!!!

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Yes, Mish...to be completely honest its terrifying!
I think it will be something I must force myself to do.

Moral of the story....don't put so much pressure on everything? Just go and have fun and if he turns out to be forever great! smile
I get it. smile


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LolaL Offline OP
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I think we should write a horror movie and entitle it Dating after Divorce.

It will scare the crap out of people.


Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..

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Originally Posted By: LolaL
I think we should write a horror movie and entitle it Dating after Divorce.

It will scare the crap out of people.


I hear that! smile

I have been on two dates and one 'meet-up lunch' with an old college classmate. First date, terrible, but easy bc then I knew I didn't have to see him again. Second date, great, but bummer bc we haven't seen each other again...meet-up was ok but since then he has flirted via text and I am not 'into' him... crazy

I swear if I lived in a larger city I would try out that 'speed dating' thing. Too many weirdos on Match.com...

Anyway, the idea of really dating someone is intriguing, but strange. Can't wrap my head around the thought that my next 'partner' won't be my husband?

OK back to Lola, I just sound weird...


Me-35

Together: 18 yrs
M-12.5 yrs
S-8
D-4
D'd: Feb. 2010

The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save. --Zeph. 3:17
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LolaL Offline OP
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No I get the whole thing. I still cannot picture really being in a relationship with someone other than the SG. This sounds soo ass backwards since I have made so much progress.

There are strange people on the dating websites. I have had two dates and one that I am not sure what the hell it was. I am so not impressed. I really liked the first one, but guess he wasn't that into me. The second was on a marathon to see how fast he could get me back to his place. Uhhhh no. And the last one started tellhing his family and making plans to move closer. STALKER...

I'm out. Can nuns have vibrators?


Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..

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Oh, this is good stuff!!!!!

Weirdo's on dating sites huh...good to know when the time comes. Speed dating sounds a bit intriguing to me as well...but ever so frightening still!

I completely know what you all are saying about having to wrap your head around the idea of being with someone other than your spouse or ex-spouse. I too (even though it's been some time already) think it is weird...must be normal.

How do you solve a problem like Maria? smile


Me: 31
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LolaL Offline OP
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I never remember having a problem when I was younger getting a date.

OF course, no one was married way back then.

Sigh.


Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..

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I know the feeling, when I was in college and Dan & I broke up, there were plenty of eligible guys around to hang out with.

14 years and two kids later....not so much~ wink


Me-35

Together: 18 yrs
M-12.5 yrs
S-8
D-4
D'd: Feb. 2010

The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save. --Zeph. 3:17
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