Are regrets when you end a separation normal?

[flowmom]

OTMT, I applaud you for looking at your own issues here.

Any ideas on how to help me respect her more?

My H doesn't respect me. I think some reasons are:

• he has become a lot more image conscious due to his success in business (he has made a name for himself) and he is spending more time with superficial people -- as a unfit, overwhelmed, sleep-deprived stay at home mom I don't fit the mold of what people around him value and respect...the things that he used to value in me don't seem as important to him now
• he has really high standards for others (other-oriented perfectionism) and himself...I think he projects his expectations of himself onto me, and of course I disappoint
• he doesn't respect his mother and he projects that onto women in general

I think that respect begins with oneself, and then extends outwards. I think that if you really dig, you'll find that lack of respect for yourself is at the root of your lack of respect for your wife.

Sometimes you have to trick your mind into looking at things from a different perspective. Can you write down 5 things that you respect about your W?