So what is it that you want? It seems like if you are insisting on a go-between it's like you're running away from her. You've got to man up and be able to face her.
A go between was suggested to me by sandi so that I could detach. I am so attached to my ex that she feels that would be the only way to detach.
As you said, when she leaves "for the day"...somedays its like she's leaving me all over again.
And as far as my reactions, I am apparently reacting to things she hasnt even done on top of things she has done.
With what I've posted in my sitch, apparently the main thing that those who've read it think will work is essentially cutting off contact in every way.
I've either gotta "run away" as you put it to break the dependency I have on her for my happiness and risk becoming a faint memory in her mind, or stay and be her friend and possibly have some happiness while risking torture from OM getting all the real closeness with her. And either way I go, there are no guarantees...she might still end up with OM.
