Sorry I haven't been posting but I have been following. Busy with the party stuff. I haven't forgotten about my promise on the book, will get it out to you this week.
Re: rescuing and fixing being controlling...yes, I totally agree. I think if more people understood this it would help them to let go of the behaviors. I know that once I saw it that way it helped me. I still struggle a bit but at least I can now analyze the sitch, ask myself what it would accomplish, and just back off. It is hard.
I don't know about not being able to totally detach. The way I understand detachment is that it's not about not having a connection, it's about personal responsibility. You can still be open and connected with H, but not basing your own happiness on him. Does that make sense?
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
