H was in a good mood this morning, he even let me sleep while he got the kids ready for school. He didn't even seem terribly upset that one ended up on a 2 hour delay & the other one missed the bus. He must be feeling better because that normally would have set him off.
I keep wanting to apologize to everyone & tell people here that he really isn't an asshat--he's a good man who is going through a rough time. Obviously there is some redeeming quality about him if I'm willing to go through all of this just to save our M. But I'm not going to, I'm not going to make excuses for him, not to anyone here and, more importantly, not to myself.
I've been reading through quite a few of the threads here and I see myself in so many of them, both the good & the bad. I think just putting this here will help me see the bigger picture, help keep the problems in perspective when my judgement becomes clouded with emotion.
I have my first workout with my trainer this afternoon. I'm excited! Maybe some good physical exertion will help clear my mind.
I'm wondering if anyone has any experience with DBing, GALing, and still trying to help someone get the help they need. Can you do both? I've been reading up on the testosterone deficiency that Gardner wrote about and I think it's worth H asking his doc about. But I don't know how to broach the topic without him feeling like I'm criticizing him, especially about something like a hormone that essentially controls everything *Manly* about him. I don't want it to sound like I'm saying he is less than a man.
No one ever told me M wold be this hard. I wasn't expecting soft & fluffy--but I never thought it would be like this.
hanging in there, shelbel
edit for typos
Last edited by shelbel; 02/08/1002:20 PM.
formerly known as "shelbel" Me 40, stbxh 40 DSs 9, 7 & 3 M9, T10 Stbxh is a diagnosed bipolar & an addict. The end.
