In many states, D requires separate lawyers because of conflict of interest. Some states do not require a L at all if all the terms can be agreed upon amicably (usually if there are no minor children).
Honestly, if this upsets your H, that is his problem. You must take steps to protect yourself financially through out this. That does not mean that you have to be the one to file or move the process forward, but knowing you have someone on your side, to back you up and look out for your best interests is always a good thing.
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
