I would seek out the advice of a lawyer now and begin discussing how to set up the house, i.e., your son gets 1/2 and you the other 1/2. At this time, you are just seeking information and checking out lawyers. There is no need to advise your h of your decision to retain a lawyer right now. However, if he should mention it again in the future, I would then advise him if you have retained one. Whether he gets mad or not, you have to protect yourself financially. The mlcer likes for the spouse to go along w/his/her program w/o any hitches. Life doesn't work that way and if you are not careful, you will be the one w/the tin cup standing on the street corner begging for coins. They do not care whether we have sufficient funds to keep going from day-to-day. All they care about is themselves and their freedom to play.
Educate and protect yourself. This is now a business deal and one that you need to be on your toes about what you need to do to come out "whole".
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
