Lost, No, you do not want your h living w/you while he is in crisis. You would be walking on egg shells 24/7 and the emotiional bouncing off the walls would get to you. The stress would be horrible and the children would suffer from the stressors just as you would. They wouldn't understand why their father is behaving the way he is. Be thankful that he graces the presence of you and your children periodically. At least by doing this, he is able to see the children and act somewhat normal.
The words separation/divorce are words that they use to "lord" it over us. Some will go on and file and others will only bring those words out of the closet when we get too close. As to what your h will do, we do not know. So, as we all have stated, leave him alone, give him all of the space he can choke on and try to muddle through each and every day while he's out there. Detaching is the only way to survive this ordeal.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
