Just because someone posts on your thread and says that your wife is "doing" some OM, doesn't make it so.
Moreover, just because some posters are one-trick ponies and can only tout one line, over and over again, through thread after thread, doesn't mean that the issue of OM or no OM is even the relevant issue in your situation at the moment.
Gucci says the same thing everywhere he goes. He is almost universally loved because he says what all of us WANT to say about affairs and those who conduct them.
The fact that he's been saying it through hundreds of posts does not make him an expert, so be sure to take his advice just like you would take anyone else's advice - with a grain of salt.
Personally I'm appalled that here at newcomers is where gucci and his ilk hone in on people who are hurting and confused, and they do their level best to convince those wounded people to take steps and actions that are all but sure to do three things
1) convince your spouse that you really are the [censored] they thought you were
2) drive the connection between the two of them even closer,
3) make certain that you put the final nail in the coffin of what remains of hope for your marriage.
There are a lot of affairs on this board. And there are many, many times where newcomers THINK there is not, but there actually is. That still doesn't mean that some non-thinking, cookie cutter approach works on situations that are as unique and complicated as the individuals in them.
And that's MY personal opinion.
Blessings,
Bill
I'd say I'm offended but I can't say that I am. You're entitled to your opinion just as I am along with the rest of "Gucci's ilk" LOL!
We offer advice, no one is forced to do anything.
However the bulk of these new users that come to these forums will lanquish and spend months and/or years doing what you propose and continue to complain and whine for that same period of time about how things aren't changing and how the WAS is still the WAS and still seeing the other person.
And hey Bill, if you want to be here and offer that shoulder for them to cry on, that is your choice. I would rather offer advice that works instead of offering a "there, there, let it all out, things will get better one of the days/weeks/months/years, she has to change her feelings eventually"
Bill you sound a bit jaded in your response and I could be wrong, but you sound angry, maybe you yourself spent alot of time in limbo in your own situation trying everything and nothing worked or maybe you busted your divorce by following your methods, I don't know. But you do sound a bit angry.
If someone doesn't want my advice, they have to just ask and I will respect that decision.
