I'm sorry to say this, but prepared to be lied to and have to decide how to deal with this or whether to ignore it. I was not lied to for a decade (and no, I wasn't in denial) but now I am. Also, I made the decision to have a boundary discussion about it recently, and it was not fun. I think my H has the temperment your DB coach referred to. I think your DB coach is correct about setting your H off with your tone and words. That said, my IC said there is a problem with treating adults with kid gloves. So contradictory advice. I'm trying to go the middle road. There are some good communication books that talk about soft start ups and things like that. The problem is, a lot of kneejerk conversations get started or triggered in life and then you're suddenly in the middle of one. So you must retrain yourself yet not walk on eggshells. It will take practice and be necessary with your coparenting.
