Hey M, how you doing? I agree with Saffie, dont send it, sounds kind of bitter anyway, you know? Saffie is right, he DOESNT want to be with ow. Which reminds me, aside from your H's issues, you really really need to let it go now.. this obsession that he is contacting her/ likely to go back to her. Its damaging what little chance you have left.
As for H, the way Saffie describes the effect depression had on her (eventhough she 'knew' she loved her H, she couldnt really show it, or ML to him).. sounds exactly like my bf. He walked out afterall hey and wouldnt even tell me his address for 5 months. And yet he says now, he knew he loved me all along, he was just in a mess, 'mental' etc.. but yes, continued to appear largely normal and do well at work etc.
They call it living outside the wall - living with a depressed person. You cannot penetrate and its not your fault. You need to stop taking it personally, as you are, and seeing it as rejection, which is what I had to do to forgive my bf and make our new R work.. and yes it is very hard. So, you also have a choice, you dont have to stay with him if you are finding this too damn hard.
How about calling that C and asking her if she feels your H is depressed and would benefit from ADs? How about talking to H about his lack of connection with you and the world around him and ask him if he feels he may be depressed? Bearing in mind this is a very hard thing for anyone to admit to, neverlone seek help for.
Love Al xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
