Eeyore ... I thought you said you weren't going to be a donkey no more. You're getting 100% spot on advice from some of the best people on this board.
I won't be getting involved in your thread, but here's a tip for you:
1) You're in denial 2) You're living in fear of her 3) You're ignoring the truth
If you don't show the people here that you're willing to do the work it takes to break this affair. There are hundreds of other people on this board who would die to have their time, advice and attentions... so why should they waste their time on you if you continue to ignore them?