Lost, You are right where everyone has been that has been here any length of time. You've been given great answers to your questions. You are frustrated about him, the behavior and other people.
As for the blizzard, some of us are in the same one that you are right now. So, buckle down, do what you need to do around your house and wait the storm out. In fact, this is a good time to dig out the MLC archives and start reading. As for your h walking out into the blizzard, that's his choice and he's a grown man. God takes care of those who are drunks, fools and children. Trust me, your h is somewhere safe and sound last night. I know that you were worried about his safety, etc., but you need to try to still those feelings and look to your children and yourself, especially in this storm.
It's okay to question his stupidity in your mind, but not to him because he can't give you a rational answer. Emotions that are not handled properly can cause a person to say or do things that they may or may not remember later on. Emotions are what is driving your h to do the things he's doing, right alone with depression. They flip on a dime and can say one thing now and 2 minutes later say something else. So, you cannot take what they are saying to the bank. However, you can learn how to sift through the garbage he does spout and find the meaning of what he is trying to say. It takes practice, but you can do it.
I hope you are feeling better today. Sit tight and wait the storm out. Bake up some cookies, clean the house, read a good book, watch a movie and check out the archives. One more thing...draw a hot bath and pour some nice bubblebath into the tub and soak away your frustration. It does help.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
