Doing hard time on the MLC chain gang.

[MHL]

Please do not misunderstand me. I never said your W was abusive.

Was the interaction inappropriate between a 13yo girl and her mother? Probably.

My big question to that though is why does your D know the specifics anyway?

Cat,
Thanks for the words of wisdom, all things I know but is sometimes need to be reminded especially coming from the mother's perspective.

The big question everyone asks is how does D13 know all this stuff?

As horrific as this sounds, my W told her when my D13 unloaded on her after A #2 was exposed. I was not there but my neighbor/ good friend was there for my daughter b/c my daughter was afraid of my W, afraid that she would hurt her. After the 1 hour exchange our friend filled me in on what was said b/c she was concerned for my D13 mental health afterwards.

My W told my D she had been with multiple men, one night stands, that she was addicted to the attention. She was an adult woman and had "needs". My W went on to explain that OM#2 had all the qualities she was looking for in a man. She told my D that she thought that I had hired him to seduce her and fall in love with her so I would have more ammo for a Divorce and could take D13 and her brother away. She went on to promise D13 she would stop seeing OM#2 if D13 wanted her too. Never did. My W ended the conversation saying that she was going to have to leave D13 and her brother to be happy. This entire event took place 3 days after a family counseling session between my W and D13 where wife had promised D13 that OM#1 was biggest mistake of her life and would never ever happen again. She had been in R with OM#2 for at least 2 weeks at that time. Biggest issue for D13 is the lies and then the lying about lying.

Heavy stuff I know, but I try to explain to my D13 that mom was sick (true) and still is to a degree, but she is on meds now and that she is getting better.

Not disagreeing with you on anything, just saying that the sitch IMO is extraordinary and that my D13 has a maturity of an older child. While she is the child and I am the adult I am trying to take into consideration what she does know about something that is way beyond her years.

In the meantime, you can show her your strength in other ways. As her father, a man who guides her, a man who can find happiness in his life, inspite of the current situation.
By being her rock through all of this adversity. Not by constantly trying to convince her of why you are making the choices you are making.

During the part of the session with her C that I was in on, I did tell my D13 that she may not understand my decisions but she will come to appreciate what I am doing some day. Also she knows that she can come to Dad to tell me anything and Dad will always be there just to listen.