Losing Desire to Reconcile

[gr8 day 2B alive]

what have you done for you?

I have gotten back to playing basketball and working out.
I have taken up cooking as a hobby, I enjoy creating good eats.
I have personalized the house to my color schemes and decor.


What have you done to change you?

I am more aware of my actions towards W, understanding that I lacked giving her praise for being a great mom.
I compliment her more often.
I remember to send out cards for birthdays and special events.
I have read more relationship books in the past 5 months than I have read all type of books in the past 5 years.
I have changed my appearance and my outlook on life.


Are those changes related to your faults in the breakdown of your M?

My changes are a result of a failed relationship. Maybe it was a blessing in disguise. To build a great new relationship with W. Plan B-- a great new relationship with new lady.


What do you do with that free time?

I cook, take care of the kids needs(House Chores) , spend more time with my family and more time with close friends.

Your W like mine thought the party life was the way to go? How long do you really think the reality that she is a MOTHER will escape her?
Not sure on this one. She was a great mother and we always received compliments from strangers on how well behaved our kids are. After 3 years of being a full type mom, I think she felt burned out from spending all of her time with the kids. This is where I messed up. I came home from work and I received all the fun attention from the kids. I was the FUN parent b/c I didn't have to discpline the kids. I looked forward to coming home and seeing the kids. I never made time for US.

I don't blame her for leaving, I just don't like the way she handled the situaion. SHe could have came to and said something like "Listen, I feel we don't spend enough quality time together. If you don't start making time for me, I will be leaving you" I think this is clear and to the point.
I received a comment- "I think I need to reconnect with you"

Knowing what I know now, that was the red flag. Back then I was too clear what that meant. Shame on me for not clarifiying, shame on her for not being specific.
Communication has been our problem.

This is why I feel if I don't address the R, I will be showing her that I haven't learned to commincate.
On the other hand, I am trying to show her through my actions that I have changed.