I think I would add this, Trusting. The urge to get some remorse and regret is that we want to believe we weren't crazy and we were in love.
Maybe we need to let go of that need for validation, too. I know it isn't easy but we might never get it.
With that said, it seems that they generally do have some words at some point. My friend heard from her X of about 8 years ago--long apology as he knows he wronged her.
She didn't answer.
M: 16 years Bomb 4/07 OW 20s long gone Divorced 11/09 I remarried New Guy Cooperative r w/X regarding D