OK... I know this is going to be hard but do NOT give in to him when he seeks you out. Leave the home if you have to. And if you walk out of your home he has to stay with the kids right? That means no OW.
He needs to know he can't have you both...
Responses for "She's the only one I can talk to.."
SHE is just doing DAMAGE AND HURTING YOUR FAMILY... she's NOT helping.
She is NOT the only one you can talk to. You have friends and there ARE FAMILY THERAPISTS that are TRAINED to help families with problems without HAVING SEX with you... She's NOT a PROFESSIONAL THERAPIST ... She's not helping she's HURTING... me, you AND OUR CHILDREN.
She's not a therapist, she's ATTACKING your marriage AND your FAMILY.. you should be PROTECTING US from HER
My advice is to follow OW or get a friend to follow her. That should lead you to OM eventually if you don't know where he lives. Or hire a private investigator to do it.
You are doing well though.. you are walking away and focussing on the problem. It's ok to attack HER with FACTS in protest. Just don't criticize HIM at all. NO NAME CALLING. Stick to facts that will wake HIM up about what SHE's doing to your home.
Next time you set a boundary and he tries to follow you LEAVE or SHUT the DOOR behind in a room, lock it, and play loud music to drown him out. TELL him you want to be ALONE until she's GONE.
