Eventually you will find that even if you do react, your reactions will be different than they would have been in the past.
Right now, if you can learn to validate his feelings, eventually it could make a difference in your communication.
I did notice that what I responded to him was different than what I would have a few months ago. This time when he blamed it all on me I refused to own his stepping outside the marriage as a solution. I told him that before that point we were equal: We both hadn't the tools to deal with crisis, we both had made mistakes, and we both did not know what was wrong exactly with our marriage or how to fix it.
I'm working on the validating part... Am reading a book called "Crucial Conversations" (sorry I don't have it handy to give the author's name. It has so far been very enlightening...
~ This Diamond now SHINES!! ;-p ~
My Sitch in MLC - http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Main=45253&Number=1901148#
