Quick question for all of you out there. Have you ever been at a point where you have just had enough??? I realize that our spouses are ill and I also realize that I shouldn't believe anything they say whenever they spew their venom, however
Yes there are people on here who have reached that limit, and there are people on here who THOUGHT they reached that limit and after they cooled down and dug a little deeper realized they haven't. Make sense?
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let's reality check for a moment here...
Pssst... I'll let you in on a little secret....currently, only one of you is living in reality.
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For those of you with an OW/OM wrapped up in your MLC spouses life, put yourself in your spouses shoes for a moment. Although I realize it may be tough to say what I would do, but I myself have been through a depression and never once did it cross my mind to have an affair. Frankly, I didn't have the motivation for one either during a depression. It never once crossed my mind to leave behind all that I held precious at one time or another. It never once crossed my mind to not accept the help of a professional (as a matter of fact, I was dying for it). Although I know MLC and depression are two different beasts, there are glaring similarities as well.
Apples and oranges here. You most likely do not have the childhood issues that he does which are a key ingredient in all of this. They do NOT have the coping tools like you and I. His tools are either broke or not there.
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I think I have no choice but to go ahead and file for a legal separation to protect myself and get the bills paid at the very least.
You think or are you absolutely certain? Be very honest with yourself here. Is there a bunch of emotion fueling your decision or is this what you have to do. It won't snap him out of this.
Don't get me wrong, you come first and if this is what you have to do then you do whatever it takes to protect yourself.
This is a decision you and only you can make.
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Getting more fired up by the minute!
Careful, emotions + decisions = Not good.
Take a deep breath and find some quiet time away from all of this to really think about your options here.
