You're hiding behind S24 here Dale. Not good. If he is free then let him step up and do the work. This is HIS son we're talking about here. It's time for him to step up and be his own man.
This will free you of the obligation. Just like you will be using son to prevent conflict, your W will also be doing the same thing. The matters that she may wish to discuss are between the two of you -- AND SHOULD STAY THAT WAY.
This will buy you more time that you need to prepare yourself.
EDIT: Post your plan here for review so we can poke holes in it and adjust it.
