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Well LR, now we're in the same boat. Just found out my H went on a nighttime work trip with (former EA?) coworker this weekend when he also asked me not to call him for a few days. Did they stay the night? No way to ever know. Now I'll be ODP for at least 48 hours because I already sent a short text I shouldn't have that needed the 48 hour ODP treatment. So my boundary on lying (and lying through hiding and omission) was just crossed. Are the stars poorly aligned this week? Now I'm amazed you kept your mouth shut with H in same house at all. If mine was here, I would have lost it for sure. So my hat's off to you about the self control on the sister IM issue.

Last edited by rr22; 02/04/10 03:42 AM.
rr22 #1930285 02/04/10 04:04 AM
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Sometimes wonder if this is all worth it!


M48 H53
M16 T18
S16 D13
SS30
H drops bomb PA/8-30-09
H leaves 12-30-09
D filed by H 2-10
H asks to come home 4-11
Piecing
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It may not be!!!!

rr22 #1930373 02/04/10 11:14 AM
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Still keeping quiet girls no worries.. Still putting some thought into this one, maybe its a battle that will never be won I dont know. Ironically my H twitches when he is either angry or doing something he shouldnt be so its a doddle to spot lol! I think perhaps that the best way to handle this is to give him something not worth losing ME!


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W 47
H 47
M 24
T 30

Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Lost Rabbit #1930406 02/04/10 01:47 PM
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Hugs to you rr22!

Good job LR! YOU ARE worth it!


M48 H53
M16 T18
S16 D13
SS30
H drops bomb PA/8-30-09
H leaves 12-30-09
D filed by H 2-10
H asks to come home 4-11
Piecing
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Well you mentioned your sister brings up some insecurities about yourself - don't let her win in that way! KNOW inside how wonderful you are, how lucky he is to have you = and he will feel it. He knows it too, he's just testing you.


Me: 42
Him: 43

Two divorcees in a relationship
Butterfly1 #1930634 02/04/10 05:33 PM
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yup strong, calm, confidence in sticking to your guns about your boundaries - that's the way to go! smile

rockedworld #1930680 02/04/10 05:53 PM
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A 180 would be to start participating in their IM relationship.
Ask him to email her a message for you. Somethign lighthearted. Keep doing this and acting like you enjoy the three-way IM fun until you take the illicit control thrill out of it for him. Do this for two or more months. Make him feel like a go-between between you two. Just a crazy thought of a totally different approach. Start off by sending both of them humorous email forwards or whatever. If you gave him permission, what would happen? Thrill might be gone.

rr22 #1930747 02/04/10 06:52 PM
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Your fantastic girlies xx

Interesting thought RR only thing is he talks to her on his FB Im not a friend with either of them, but like the idea of getting him to send her a message will have to think some things up on that one lol!


____________________________

W 47
H 47
M 24
T 30

Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Lost Rabbit #1930958 02/04/10 09:41 PM
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How about joining FB and friending them? Then you can see when they are both online - and "join in?"

Well it's been 48 hrs right? Have you decided on a plan?


Me: 42
Him: 43

Two divorcees in a relationship
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