From personal experience- both of you in the house w/o a commitment to the M from your WAW- is VERY PAINFUL and WILL HOLD YOU BACK.
If she is not committed to the M w/o OM, draw your boundary and get her out of the house. My W satyed for 4+ months, drove me nuts, and yanked my chain- only to move out anyway.
You can reclaim some power and some respect by listening to the people above.
