I'm not going to argue with you about the definition of an affair, SSMGuy. You are the one who is quibbling about that, down to your objection to the word "the." My point was simply that the question of whether you could have solved things without having an affair is impossible to answer and might as well be put aside. It's only another red herring to follow and avoid the real question, which is what you're going to do now about the situation you are in now.
