I've been sick to my stomach...not sure why maybe because I know this is becoming a reality. Nothing really has changed except that I know this is what I have to do. I'm sad that it has come to this. I do NOT want to go back to how I was...by that I mean dealing with stress and all these emotions. I've come a long way and need to stay strong. My stomach has been in a knot for the last day or so. I haven't had an appetite. I've got a lawyer in mind, been recommended by a few people. My dad has offered to pay for the divorce, that's how strongly he feels about it. Which helps because I understand they are expensive. I guess I'm grieving. So much history together, been with him since high school. Never dated anyone else. We've experienced so much together, share a child. Can't imagine being with anyone else but what has occured in the last 2.5 years isn't healthy. Not for myself, not for Jack. Mourning the man that once was I guess for 10/13 years we were together. I want peace.
