How much longer should I allow the cake eating to go on?
Not ONE second longer.. NONE.. Zilch... Nada...
What you do is LET her have him and YOU show her that you don't share. It isn't an option. Since she wants him, then she can have him. This is done matter of factly, firmly and confidently...
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When I go home, should I just be "perfect dad" and not bring up any R stuff?
YES. YOu do bring up relationship stuff. HERE is how it is done....
"I have been doing some thinking AND here is what I HAVE DECIDED. I have decided that since you want out of this relationship and are not sure what you want, that YOU should move out and find a place of your own. I think you should be out of here within two weeks. I have realized that I have been pursuing you and chasing you and have not been listening to you when you told me that you didn't love me the way a wife should. I have decided I will not live that way and don't want to be with a woman who doesn't WANT to be with me"....
THAT is it.. You then stick by that theme... You let HER come to you . If she doesn't then you continue to move forward with her moving out, the divorce and you taking care of YOU.
You don't need to bring up the other man other than to push her TOWARD him as you back off and show her emotional strength.
YOu other option is to do what most all of the other guys on this site do. They hang in there for months on end, which turns into years.. END RESULT... DIVORCE and wasted time..
Women do NOT repsond to men who chase them when they are having an affair. They lose respect for you. She will respect you more if you are willing to put everything on the line to show her you won't allow her to have two men fighting for her..
This is the way that I have seen work the best of any. STrong, confident, matter of fact, reslolved...
In your interactions with her, just be nice. Don't tell her you love her. Make the conversations short and to the point and let her WONDER what you are thinking....
