Next steps

[avermont]

Geez, Pearl, I can totally see snapping on the cats!

One of the scenarios I played out today was having to move to an apt. temporarily, and it is really hard to find apts. that will take pets. But the thought of HER touching MY cats--no way! If I have to camp in the woods to keep them out of her grubby little hands, I will. Let her have X---here's a big secret--HE HAS BACKNE!!! sorry, is that TMI? The cats do not have acne. So there.

I also cannot get over your ovaries on kicking him out of the house, as you were in a non-salary earning sitch at the time. WOW!

A good friend just called and counseled and counseled against going to court. All she says, and many of you have said, is true: the house is a pile of dust now. I am not depressed here, like LFA is. I do pretty good here. I still like it here.

I think most of my friends are going to counsel against going to court, just to spare me more pain and the loss of $.

One very pragmatic friend wrote: $ lasts. Emotions don't. You have a support group for emotions, but sorry, no one has $ support to offer you. Take the $.

But chr**st, that just makes me feel like a money-grubber. Hey, whatever, trash my heart, $ makes up for it, no worries.

So--a lot of thinking to do.

The pragmatic friend also advised that if I sell the joint property bed, as X offered it to me in his proposal, it may look like I am willing to go with the rest of the proposal. So I can't necessarily divest myself of that particular piece of bad memory right off.

I will start the boxing up exercise. Pulled a few more books off the shelf tonight, to donate away. Have been doing that all along--pulling, tossing, burning. I want to lug away as little as possible.

Common law won't apply in this sitch. The court will look at it as a business partnership to be somehow fairly divided.

I will email more to the lawyers tomorrow. I will have some time sitting in the car dealership waiting for an oil change. (another fun thing! When I bought the Subu, X was all about how he would take it up to the dealership for work, as it is on his way to work! Now, another 3 hours of my life wasted in driving and waiting...all the little things that you planned on...)

Well--back to LFA and her to meet/not meet question.