Miss her.. had to do some googling and do you mean Charlotte?
no... different city in NC. if I were to say it would narrow it down just a bit too much. I'm still trying to keep somewhat anonymous here.... maybe some day I will be more "out".
Haven't posted in a while... things are just still pretty dark.
Was cooped up w/ wife and kids over the snow in over last weekend and had its usual ups and downs. It should have been fun-- and was at times with the boys but it was very tough being there with her... then we watch the superbowl and she asks me to sit next to her and then falls asleep with her head lying right next to me... then the next morning back to old tricks...its all just a game she is playing to cake eat.
She is just on such a streak of pathalogical lying (new leather couch was there that she said her sister bought her-- but I know did not-- obviously a present from OM).
She takes me for a ride, acts nice... then not.
I have had to wrestle control of the finances from her over these last few days-- there is a line of credit that she told me she was paying interest on that has gone into litigation that I just found out about-- was dealing with that today- as she was lying to me all day about talking to some fictitious "lady" who said it was fine and just needed to be re-written. I called her on the lies. This is getting into serious business here, so I cannot just say "fine" to these lies that are financially destroying me.
she is like poison. She has the unnerving ability to look me dead in the eye without blinking, blushing, or looking away and just completely tell me the most fabulous lies.
She is cruel, heartless...
I am visiting a friend out west. going to do some skiing... but meanwhile I have spent the day going through the finances and trying to get a grip on things.
I have been a doormat-- allowed her to walk all over me and manipulate me and make me miserable these last 7 months... and ruin me fincancially. but I am trying to gain some self respect and move on with things. She is so long gone-- I do not see any sort of good end to this-- anytime soon that is for sure.
I am having exchanges with her regarding how big a deal it is that this loan has gone into litigation and she sends me a self portrait she took of the two of us last weekend. serious mind games she is trying to play.
Good for you on taking control of your financial security.
I gotta agree with you - the lies and cake eating - those are huge turnoffs. And it is difficult for you to not be affected by them emotionally.
You may think there is no hope now, but there may very well be some surprised in your future. At least it is fairly certain that she wont be filing for a D since the status quo seems to be working for her ok now.
Good to hear you are going to get away and do some turns in the powder. I can't think of anything that could be better for getting your mind off of things.
I would give anything to be in Jackson Hole right now!!
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
You've observed some of the worse traits of the alien, although maybe not of the worst alien. We've read about some doosies here.
Glad you are finding about finances sooner that totally too late.
Something we wonder sometimes about the aliens though, is there really a destructive plan behind their nuclear actions? Or, have they really totally lost some part of themself that used to do such a great job of keeping reality in check? Do they color outside the lines because they want to break rules, or have their eyes simply lost the ability to focus? Kinda makes you want to poke them just to see if they will blink in time or look away. Uh, someone might think I was serious about that ... it sounds different when read back in court ... so we shouldn't do any poking in the eyes - right?
If you hit Jackson Hole you might run into someone I know belly dancing in town or sipping Tequila nearby. She's even been known to mix paint in a hardware store and if you're nice the can gets signed with a smiley face. That's also how the conversations go. Hey, enjoy skiing. You need it.
This hot cold BS she is doing? This crap that hurts you to the quick.
That is her confusion. That is the MLC.
If she DIDN'T want you around you would know it, and a smart man would plan accordingly.
She doesn't know what she wants, so it is harder on you. Boo Hoo. On the good days, enjoy the heck out of them and show her why she should want you around. On the bad days get away and do not react.
Come on man, you're a smart guy.
And we are saying the same things, several times over.
Get it. Learn it. Live it.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
thank you for thinking of me today and your support, as always.
kerry, was2 and miss you thanks for the thoughts and advice as always... Jackson is a really cool town by the way.. I love it here. I grew up in vermont and there are a lot of vermonter type people here-- feels like home.
I should say I suppose I am losing some faith in the process a bit.
Tell me your thoughts on the issue of "respect". There are some people who feel that once your wife loses respect for you then its over and until you can get that back then you don't have a chance. That you need to be less wuss like... that if she feels she can keep you where she likes and knows you will always be there for her then that's just where she will keep you...
but having to deal with her with regards to the finances, which she has royally screwed up has been a little rough over the last few days. I got sick of her lying to me and telling me that she had taken care of something-- when it wasn't. So I called her on it (since she kept trying to save face and continue to drag out the lie).
Lying is something that I have a really hard time with. And with her its like poison and I can't get away from it.
maybe give me some advice, all of you, on how I can deal with giving her a budget tomorrow- (transferring money to her acct)-- in such a way that I do it with class... she will not be happy to have a governor on her spending... till now she's had full reign over the acct. obviously that hasn't worked out all that well for me...
