Looking for Advice

[gutwrenching]

CG - gosh I can't believe what you just wrote - right under my nose and i didn't see it. You are right. Talking personal issues at work is a kind of recent/new development...didn't used to happen much at all (niether before nor after the bomb). I never really saw that and certainly didn't see it as cake eating. I changed that dynamic more so than she did, and now she has latched on. I can relflect I changed it b/c of jealousy about OM whom she was contacting non-stop at work. But all indications is that has stopped or slowed to an extreme deep cover crawl.

If she wants a change at home she needs to see there will be changes at work as well. It is not a pick and choose type deal.

You are very lenient with your W and her crappy behavior.

I don't quite follow what you are saying here. And yes I have always been very lenient on crappy behavior, even when things were going ok with us.