When she said "it didn't have to be like this and you made it this way" you missed a very good opportunity to validate her feelings. But you don't know what validation is. Instead you decided to pursue more by even MENTIONING spending time together YET AGAIN.
alright well my task for the evening will be to get a grip on validation reading threads here.
however from your response I think I may already know what it is and have actually done it before without it being called "validation".
A book I recently read by Burns called "Feeling Good Together" has 5 communication techniques when talking to someone who is at odds with you. Essentially you agree with what they say and then empathize with their feelings without necessarily offering a solution to their issue.
