See hope, want to get there

[Deep]

Well, I'll like to chip in to say that I believe everyone has the best interests of marriages at heart here, even if we disagree at times on the best way forward.

There are some who do need lots of "unconditional love", particularly if they felt that was what was missing in the M. But human nature is such that people often need a catalyst for change, or to snap them out of a fog.

I'm a strong, strong believer in Retrouvaille. Wouldn't be where I am without it. Even there, they do stress that couples coming in must want to work at the M and that all As must have ceased. I would say that's where tough love and DB principles may help.

You're right about the mutual respect thing CGU; right now it's on your part of the scale that needs some balancing it seems.