It is so hard to know what to do. I am at a similar crossroads, although not dealing with this for as long in marriage (started when dating). I have decided what I want out of life and have told H what I want. It is so hard to wait for H to change and to know when to move on or wait a little longer for possible changes.

I feel for you! I don't know about your e-mails, but if you want a response, maybe make sure you ask specific questions that don't need long responses so he can have a chance to succeed. Not that you should baby him or lower your standards, but if you want him to reach your goal and change, you may need to break it down into even smallers steps.

Just a suggestion.

Me29 S3
H left 4/1/09
I file 8/2/10
Divorce final 5/17/11
1st http://www.tinyurl.com/25lhu52
2nd http://www.tinyurl.com/2c35ueg
3rd http://www.tinyurl.com/322yk89