Jack - spoke with IC and she confirmed that she believes W is in a MLC - so that wraps up the question on is or is she not..the question I have know is...do I confront her on the EA (potential PA)? Am I just suposed to stick around. One of the last text that I saw (several weeks ago)...was "althought I don't text you often know that I think about you daily". How I am suppose to take this %$^%$^%$? I think I know what your answer is going to be which is GAL and do nothing.
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
2) Continue to be kind to her and even invite her out
3) I noticed that she smiles when I flirt so I'll keep doing a little of this but not to the extreme.
4) Continue to GAL
By the way see my post re: OM - It's really pissing me off but then again I am not 100% sure how much they talk. I suspect she has a separate phone again. Help
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
I read your sitch...7 months...your my hero dude! You give me hope buddy. Funny thing is that mine does not mention the D often. It may be because she has a new job and is working almost 50 hours a week. For the most part things are pleasent/civil - I guess I am starting to realize that I want more and just need to be patient. The OM/EA thing really P's me off.
Many thanks to everyone who has responded. Please keep checking on me. Trust me I need the support.
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
2) Continue to be kind to her and even invite her out
3) I noticed that she smiles when I flirt so I'll keep doing a little of this but not to the extreme.
4) Continue to GAL
My answers would be 1-no,Do you trust her that all your money might not disappear 2-yes 3-yes 4-yes
Lastly before you do anything post it on this board, wait 48 hours, get the best advice possible, and then make your decision. In MLC time you got lots of it. No need to do anything fast.
Thanks again OP. Really appreciate it...It is really hard to tell what the heck she is going thru. She does not talk - appears to be happy and just goes about her day. She just started a new job and is doing everything that she said she would to prepare herself to WA. I guess I really have no choice but to continue to GAL. This really sucks. She does not exhibit any of the MLC typical behaviors. Does not appear depressed on the contrary she appears quite happy. She does not have to worry about the kids since I am covering this so right now I feel like thier is nothing that will make her "think" or "consider" what she is doing. Knowing her the way that I do...she is patient...very patient...so I think she may be trying to wait me out. Who knows. I guess I need to stop considering what she is thinking. Any other advice?
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
1) Should I help her connect with the kids? My daughter especially misses her.
2) I was going to invite her to lunch tomorrow?
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
1) Should I help her connect with the kids? My daughter especially misses her.
I would say that you should help your D8 connect with her mom. Your focus should be on D8 not on her mother. You need to be the best DAD you can be. You have to worry about your kids and you. Not W.
I tried to invite her out for lunch but was shot down. I am really starting to question what else I should do. I need help here guys. She seems almost totally disconnected. Any suggestions?
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
She seems almost totally disconnected. Any suggestions?
This is not about her. Detach. GAL. Use this time to work on you. Be the best DAD you can be. Be the best ericmsant2 you can be. She is giving you this time as a gift. What is it that you would like to do that you haven't had time to do because you were married. Connect with old friends. Are you on the alt? = (FB) Do not worry about her. I understand that is hard. We all struggle with it every day but that is what you must do. This is not a 3 week event. It is LONG! She will have ups and downs, good days and bad days, do not dwell on them.
I would really suggest reading the resources. You need to understand what you are dealing with.
Thanks OP - I have read the resources but I still struggle with if she is a WAS or a MLCEr. This EA is killing me. I tried to confront her with it a few months ago but it continues (i believe) I refuse to look at the cell bill anymore plus she may have picked up another separate phone. I so want to call his wife and tell her but I think that may be the wrong move. I know I need to detach and GAL but since I was the controlling disconnected spouse for so many years I feel like I need to try and understand what she is going thru if indeed it is a MLC. I wake up every morning and make her breakfast, she has started a new job and now carrys the insurance. She normally is pleaseant but short with me. If I know I need to detach but I miss her.
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
